Palestine

Tear gas bombs exploding over kitchen

table. Pulsing vein in my head.

Sitting with a friend in West Oakland.

We talk about her trip

to Palestine, she stops talking, her eyes

glaze over, shows me the pictures of death.

It’s a new dawn, it’s a new day. It’s a new life. 

Innumerable holes in buildings

children play in the front –

her talking is scattered –

I see the tear gas canisters

exploding above her head

hear their firecracker whisper

smell the burning bodies

the black lost vision.

It’s a new dawn, it’s a new day. It’s a new life.

I see the laughter of the Israeli soldiers

hear the screams of the moms and babies

separated. I see a Palestinian woman

head held low walking courageously alone

to buy groceries for dinner.

I see breaking bread.

It’s a new dawn, it’s a new day. It’s a new life.

Antes

your juice fell on the counter

before you were opened

before

            I opened you

the juice drained on the floor

you were still whole

Detox

the pain

hot and cold

fire and warm

im here alone-by my choice

you told me nothing

I told you leave

you come to me

I push away

twirling spirals

spinning tops

black and white

a firebed

I know this place

its too familiar

water down

orange and red

anchor my foot

needle through thread

hammer through bone

knife on the table

knife in the home

Empty

I punch through walls and throw up in your car

I date your lover and you’re glad I did

my life enhances yours

you wish I was always there

you wish I was always there

occupying empty space

space which eats at you until your intestines are gone

a tapeworm that never leaves

I am the power that the tapeworms envy

wish they could eat your intestines the way I fill you up

wish they could leave you feeling destroyed and empty

the way I leave you feeling strong

the way I leave you feeling your babies are safe

your life is safe

the world is yours

nobody can take it I have given it to you and my hands are clean and dirty

just like yours

I wash my hands in Nubian rich soap

in lovers’ water

in rose water

in puddles left over nights

in cigarette smoke

I wash my hands in your babies’ bathwater

thank you

thank you god for letting me in

thank you for housing me

thank you for the gift of words

I say thank you because I am blessed

I follow your path and the tapeworms disintegrate into dust

into nothing but dust

which when I touch it

turns to gold.